now for those who can't even be bothered to read a few one minute extracts, here you have a condensed condensed version. this basically sums it all up. don't come to me if it lacks detail.
You Kay Eff You
Before continents were crossed, there was UkFu - Jeremy and Jeff's 1993 teenage rebellion, scrambled from skateboard grease and detention-slip doodles. A four-letter middle finger to logic ["FUKU" rearranged, 3421 etched on blackboards], it thrived on chaos: Fake beeper codes, chainsawed piñatas, Pantera blasting as they weaponized absurdity. Decades later, UkFu endured - Jeff maybe a hermit with multiple Ferraris now, Jeremy still ranting about aliens - proof that entropy, like a well-flipped bike, always sticks the landing
Jeremy & Florian's 350-mile trek from Freiburg to Chamonix - with Quivo the dog gamely trotting through blisters and alpine chill - revealed that boots could break spirits as thoroughly as any desert crossing. Bike-packing 4,191km in Australia's furnace tested them further - Outback flies, 46°C heat and the eerie silence of Barrel Creek's roadhouse.
Earlier, the Pyrenees [500 miles, Atlantic to Mediterranean] forced duct-tape tires & stolen campsites, while North America's Great Divide [5,070km] threw grizzlies and desert sands at them. But Martin joined the longest test: The 5,927km Germany-Israel odyssey - fixing hubs in Turkish storms, sharing wells with Syrian families, floating in the Dead Sea's -417m awe.
In 2007, Team Gold [Martin, Jeremy & Florian] raced to Morocco: Basque thieves, Tangier Mosque plaza & a finish line washed in Mediterranean light and exhaustion.
UkFu or the road? Same rules: Scramble the plan, patch the tires, laugh when the universe laughs back.